Emotional Attunement

emotional attunement generational healing heal trauma informed trauma sensitive Sep 03, 2020

My best teacher, our toddler Tommy, reminded me of the following and I thought I would share it with you all as it's an important part of the human condition.

Because he cannot express verbally with words how he is feeling, he will express it by showing how he is feeling outwardly.

The basic mechanism is that as parents, we start feeling how he is feeling, and thus with this information we can take appropriate action to give him what he needs. This is emotional attunement.

For example, if he’s frustrated because he is hungry, he will start getting very upset and refuse any toy or show or anything that we offer him other than food. His on-going frustration will probably lead to a tantrum and crying ... and guess what ... we will become frustrated. We will start getting angry (and hopefully not have a tantrum as well).

We don’t want to feel that way, and neither does he, so we finally figure out that he is extra hungry today and everyone can relax again. It’s been a...

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Emotional Attunement

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